Kids say the darndest things...

I thought it was time to do another rendition of 'Kids Say the Darndest Things' - especially mine. I haven't been good about writing them down lately, because our schedules have been chaos, but all their recent episodes keep running fresh in my mind. Brace yourselves...

1. My kids are on 'healthy vs. junky' kick with food. Ever since we did a nutrition unit at preschool, the kids constantly ask me if things are healthy or junky. I'm thankful for their curiosity in this subject, but it doesn't always mean they eat healthier (although Faith did yell at me once after ordering McDonalds that she would never eat it again cause it's too junky. She still ate her meal.) Anyway, the most frustrating thing is that my kids argue back and forth on random food items. We were walking through the grocery store, and they were naming things as they passed. "That's healthy, this is junky" etc. Then, being the hilarious and oh-so-clever 3 and 4 year olds that they are, started saying things like "You're junky. No, grandma's healthy." and so on. Finally, Caleb got fed up and shouted in the middle of the grocery store, "Faith is healthy. Mommy's healthy. Daddy's healthy. And I'M A WOMAN!"

I'm not sure where any of that fits into the healthy vs. junky story, but I stopped the cart to burst out laughing and beg him not to shout that so loud in a public place while explaining to him that he is in fact, NOT a woman.

My thought exactly.

2. Speaking of saying ridiculous things in public places, the next one is worse: I took the kids to the bathroom at a restaurant after eating lunch. As we're opening the door, Caleb asks, "Mommy, is this the girl's bathroom or the boy's bathroom?" When I told him it was the girl's bathroom, he stops. "If this is the girl's bathroom, then why is there a boy in here?" I look up to see a not-so-feminine looking woman washing her hands at the sink! I'm thinking, "Okay, just keep walking and pretend like you didn't hear it." But no. Caleb asks again. Finally in the stall, red from the neck up, I said as loud as I could without being obvious, "Caleb you're in here because you have to come with Mommy to the girl's bathroom." Phew! Conflict diverted, right? I hope so.

3. My kids recently got vaccinated for school. So Faith is very concerned about going to the doctor. We made an appointment for Caleb to see an allergist next week, because we think he may be allergic to mosquito bites and worse, bees. Caleb is fine talking about it so I was telling him that we're going to see a special doctor to check to see if he's allergic to anything. Faith was freaking out saying she'll just stay home with Daddy while we go, or asking over and over if Caleb was going to get shots. When I reassured her that she was not going to have to see the doctor this time, she announced, "Good. Cause I'm not allergic to anything. Except Giraffes. I love Giraffes." She also told me I might be allergic to them if I really liked them.

What? Crazy girl.

(Driving to VBS for Crazy hair day)

4. I always seem to have one inappropriate potty humor joke. Welcome to my family. Yesterday, when Caleb was in the bathroom, I went in to go help him and he proudly announced, "Mommy, I pooped. Wanna smell it?"

No thanks, I'm good.
I'm sure the hubs would be proud.

And the winner for 'Kids Say the Most Precious Things' this week is Faith:

"Mommy, if you say God when you're not supposed to, you need to say sorry to your heart."

How can you argue with something so precious? Especially when she's right.

Love my precious, crazy, loving, ridiculously neurotic kids!


Kara Graves said...

hahahaha. I love your kids.

Lucy Marie said...

I love these. The woman in the washroom is my favorite! It's so good that you write them down because you'll love looking back on them later. Your kids are so precious, I saw them for a few minutes when they were staying up here and Faith was telling me all about the baby that Mommy has in her tummy, too, when she saw that I have one in mine :)

My Husband's Watching TV... said...

Great way to start my mornings with these good laughs! Thanks for sharing.

Anonymous said...

Found you on SITS! My 5 year old referred who wanted a "Hi-C" orange drink said, "I want some AC DC please!"

April said...

so cute! Stopping by from SITS-I clicked on yours because I love kids' sayings!

Lourie said...

Your kids and mine would be worthy of charging admission!!! Hahahaha.

Tina said...

Loved your post. Kids really do say the darndest things...especially the one about the poop. LOL


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