12.03.2012

DO SOMETHING

This week, my heart has been so heavy. 

Saturday morning, I got a call that my sweet friend, Amy Lewis, suddenly and tragically lost her husband, Jim, on Friday evening. As my jaw dropped to the floor and I tried to process the implications of what that meant, I couldn't stop shaking. Amy lives right around the corner from me, so I headed over there as quickly as I could, on the verge of puking the whole time. 

It was too familiar. Only this time, I wasn't looking at the moment to moment but could envision every horrible moment I faced through this painstaking journey that I was certain Amy knew nothing about yet. You'd think having walked down this awful road, I would have some insight or some inkling of what to say or what to do. All I could come up with was I need to hug her. I need to be near here. I need her to know I am here.  Past that, I was helpless.

Amy was one of the faces that continued to show up after Jeremy died. She was my comic relief, my break from real life, and one of the women who continually served me and my family. I specifically remember seeing her one morning on my way out of the house while she was making her way in bright and early to clean for me. I remember feeling overwhelmed with gratitude for one less task I had to think about, one less worry to have. 

It was two months to the day of Jim's death that I last saw him. We met up with mutual friends to have lunch after church at Dickie's. I sat on the kid-end of the table, taking pictures of the kiddos and keeping them under control, so I didn't get to interact with Jim much. But I remember a lot of laughter.

Amy and I have known each other for quite a few years. She worked at the college when I attended, and worked there with Jeremy, and she and Jim were in a small group with us a few years ago. We've grown closer even since Jeremy's death, through her generosity and our occasional week day breakfasts. My heart has been with her almost every moment since I found out. She's only 34. Jim was 39. This isn't supposed to keep happening to people around me. My heart has also been with Mark Johnson, who is one of Jim's best friend - who also happened to be the friend that found my Jeremy dead beneath his tree stand and was with Amy the moment she found out. He has lost two of his closest friends in such a short amount of time and I know the weight he is carrying is so heavy. 

My heart aches with the need to DO SOMETHING. I know how hard it was for me to ask for help, so I'm not waiting around for her to ask. I'm doing something. Anything. One thing I know is that Amy discovered the terrible news that since the life insurance policy her and Jim took out 20 months ago did not meet the 24 month limit before cashing out, she will not be receiving life insurance money. Just one more heavy burden on an already devastated heart. 

So, with the little resources I have, I have decided that for the entire month of December, I will be raising money for Amy, in honor of Jim, to cover the cost of funeral expenses and generally ease the financial burden that Amy is facing. I don't make much from this blog on my own, but with the help of all of you, I am confident that we can make a dent. A significant dent. All you have to do is click on my blog as many times a day as you can for the month of December. Make sure the page loads - THAT'S IT. Each page impression creates revenue. 

In addition, I have added a Paypal donation button at the top left of my page for people to go above and beyond the call to help. What Amy needs is community, and in the season of giving, I pray that you would consider helping this incredible woman, and my sweet friend, breathe a little easier while she struggles to take the next step without her husband of almost 11 years.


Amy & Jim Lewis - married almost 11 years.

Jim and Amy, along with some of my nearest and dearest friends, supporting my children at the Jeremy King memorial dinner last November. 

Jim & Amy's engagement photos

Jim & Amy, along with their closest friends, Tamara & Mark, at our wedding in May.

A few of the women who were staples through my grief journey, who are now walking this horrible path along side another hurting friend.


I will continue to remind you as much as I can this month to keep visiting, as well as commit to actually posting more here (I have really been slacking in that area).

Thank you in advance for the love and support I already know is over flowing for Amy. Thank you for your generous hearts and for the prayers that will be so vital to her. Y'all are such a blessing to me, and I know you will be for Amy as well.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

This awful and horrible!
My heart breaks for this family and for this young women. I didn't see any mention of children. I hope if there are children involved, that they are given all the love and support you can muster. Your a wonderful friend Veronica, I am glad she has you.
Prayers for this family.
I heard that it was tragic, did he pass the same way Jeremy did?

Anonymous said...

Amy has an awesome friend. We knew Jim long before Amy! He was a great guy. Thank you for standing by her in this time.
kathy abels

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing just a little more insight. You and this family continue to be in my prayers.

Carla Short said...

Vee-

Bless your sweet soul for acknowledging Amy for her beautiful spirit and for her love for Jim. Amy is so richly blessed to have so many deeply generous and dedicated friends. She is a rock; offering comfort to others in the midst of her horrific pain. I am so blessed to call her my sister..Jim was and will continue to be..my baby brother.

As painful as it is for my brother, Robie, and I to have lost our brother, it pales in comparison to the devastation our parents are enduring in having lost their youngest child..and the heartbreak sweet Amy is suffering.

Thank you for loving my brother..and especially now..for loving Amy.

Carla (Lewis) Short

Debbie said...

Vee- I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. I'm glad Amy has you to lean on. I too lost my husband and I would not have made it without the love and support of my friends.
Hugs to Amy and her family.
Debbie

Anonymous said...

I knew Amy and Jim from college and considered Amy to be one of my good friends at that time. I am not only saddened for her tragic and heartbreaking loss but also for the fact that Amy and I have lost touch since college.

Thank u so much for posting this blog in support of Amy..she is very blessed to have u as a friend!

Susan

Anonymous said...

We are passing the information on to all her soccer friends. She has a huge support system here if she needs us. Please let me know if she needs help with anything. Also please make sure she has a backup of all her pix with Jim. I would hate for her to lose them.

Louise Bjelobrk

megan said...

vee - for it to "count," do we need to click on the title of each blog post so that the post loads, or is it counted just to come to the blog itself? I've clicked on your blog link from my blog a zillion times today, but want to be sure I'm being actually useful.

xo

VinGirl said...

So sorry to hear this news. I will be sending my thoughts her way.

Amanda said...

Ugh x 1,000. This is awful news at any time, but around Christmas, it feels especially unfair. Will say a little prayer for her. We don't know each other, but I've been following your blog for a long time. I only hope she can get through this awfulness with as much strength and hope as you found. Happy and able to make a donation -- that's a really thoughtful idea.

Anonymous said...

You're a kind soul, Vee. I've been reloading your page all day.. Maybe you could give us update how much $ is raised

Alison said...

Veronica, I am so sorry...this must be just so gut-wrenching for you...not only being close friends, but also the timing, being at Christmas, and all of the other parallels with your life. You are doing such an amazing thing by doing this...and as always, your words are so heart-felt and expressive. I'll be thinking of you, I miss you and love you.

...and I'm probably missing it, but which advertisement do we click on also? I'll click on whatever I see, and continue to come to your page:)

Love, Alison

Anonymous said...

may everyone around Amy be selfless and loving towards her at this very difficult time... putting their own agendas, busy schedules, and grief aside to really make sure she has everything she needs.

What a sad and tragic event for Amy to have to endure at Christmas time or any other time for that matter.

These situations really do call us to stop focusing on ourselves and focus on the needs of others...

Bless Amy and her family at this time.

A good reminder for all of us to take a step back and count our blessings and not want more of the things of this world that are truly insignificant... new vehicles, more electronics, bigger houses, clothing, etc. None of that matters when you compare it to the value of a life gone too soon.

Anonymous said...

is there a church mailing address that cards/donations can be sent to?

Johnny G said...


Rochester Church of Christ
250 West Avon Road
Rochester Hills, Michigan 48307
248.651.1933


Please write on memo line "Member Care Fund"

Thanks!

Johnny G said...

Rochester Church of Christ
250 West Avon Road
Rochester Hills, Michigan 48307
248.651.1933

please write on memo line "Member Care Fund"

Thank you so much!

Johnny G said...

Rochester Church of Christ
250 West Avon Road
Rochester Hills, Michigan 48307
248.651.1933

Please write on memo line: "Member Care Fund"

Thank you so much!

DianeTaylor said...

OMG I knew what this was about the moment I saw the title of the post. I felt sick as I read further, confirming what my gut was already telling me. I am a stranger to all of you but not when it comes to sudden losses like this one. My heart aches for Amy and all of us who have lost dear ones with no chance to say good-bye. I remember the moment my phone rang with the news that my son Jonathan died in a fire. What? What? That is all I remember saying over and over...I will pray for Amy with all my heart and contribute something towards her expenses.

So so sorry to hea this news, Vee - I pray for peace for all of us.

Diane

Is there a way I can contact Amy? My words won't help but just to let her know I am praying.

Liz Mathews said...

Do you know if accessing through a mobile device counts? The only internet I have right now is through my phone, I'd hate for it not to count.

Liz Mathews said...

Do you know if accessing through a mobile device counts? The only internet I have right now is through my phone, I'd hate for it not to count.

Darryl Canty said...

Hey there,
Could you put something at the top of your blog page to let people know about your fund raising efforts for Jim Lewis. I have some people that I am directing to your page and I think it would help if there was something there at the top that would let them know they are in the right place. I am not sure if that is possible but I just thought I would put it out there.
Thanks for your generosity.

Jessica Gamache said...

Vee-
This is beautiful. Your passion and commitment to others spreads like fire. You are one amazing lady. Thank you Veron.

Anonymous said...

I wasn't able to find the paypal link. Could you please double check that's working or maybe give more specifics on where to find it? It seems like there may be something I can't quite see above the "My Story / Home" drop down box, but I'm not able to scroll above it. Thank you

Perpetual Student. said...

Hi Vee.
I'm so sorry to hear about Jim. Please pass on my thoughts to everyone involved. You don't know me, but i'm Rachael, a student from Northern Ireland. I've been reading your blog for over a year now and I wanted to show my support. I've shared links to your blog on my facebook, and on my blog. I will be viewing your blog at least once a day for the month of December. I hope you raise a lot of money. Good job so far!

New Born Babies said...

I'm pretty computer inept, but ?I clicked on create a link and left a message. If I want to leave a link at other places, how do I go about doing that? Is it hard to do? I will try to click on your blog, any chance I get, this month. God Bless You and yours.

Anonymous said...

May God Bless you and your family this Holiday Season. May He wrap his arms around you and find you comfort and peace today and alway's.

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