Just wanted to take the time to wish my brother Brian a Happy Birthday today - he would have been 27 today. The sting of his short life is still painful - almost 5 months and I've yet to really process the fact that he's gone. It became all too real for me when I finally got to see his grave today. It's beautiful and my mom and other family members have taken such good care of it and had it all decorated for his birthday
But, I just couldn't believe my brother was there. How is he under the earth? It's not right, he should still be here. I just can't make sense of it all. We drove out to Brighton to celebrate my other brother Matt's birthday (their birthdays are a day apart) - and I prayed the entire drive that he'd be able to enjoy the day and find some peace. We took him out to lunch, and it was good to be with family. Something about being all together that feels right.
Sometimes, I have a hard time digesting all the crap that's happened in the last year. Some days I can be strong, some days I fall apart, some days I think about other things. Today, I just really miss Brian and his vibrancy, and watching him with his son, and play with my kids, and tell stupid jokes, and hang out.
Happy Birthday Brian! We miss you every day, we're really struggling to put the pieces of our family back together - we need you here! Hope you're enjoying a grand celebration today - can't wait to celebrate with you again someday.
I love you, bro.
5 comments:
(((((VEE)))))
Wow, he is so handsome. I am thinking of you, knowing this time of year is just so hard. No one should have to deal with all this.
My sister in law lost both of her brother's last year - Levi was 20 and died of cancer and Noah was early 30s and died of an enlarged heart (totally unexpected). We take comfort that they are in heaven together, waiting for the rest of us. She said Levi smiled right when he died and I told her that's because Noah was right there to greet him as Jeremy was there to greet Brian.
Thoughts and prayers for you.
your brother is so handsome!
Happy birthday Brian! Hope you had partying with Jesus :)
It warms my heart to know you have another sibling! I always thought it was just you and Brian.
Vee,
There are no words that can make this better. . . just the support of family and friends, and perhaps the passage of time. Other than that, this situation is hard, hard, hard :( I'm so sorry for both of your losses and I hope with each passing year your life improves and becomes rich and joyful.
Merry "early" Christmas from your friend in California!
Joanne
I just found your blog today thanks to The Coupon Goddess, & I can tell you that from here on out you have one more person praying for you & your family. I've been sitting here crying for you & praying for you. You are a strong woman in my eyes.
Thinking of you Vee! Love and hugs to you and the kids!!
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