future and past

Spent a nice, chill day with your family. It was an absolutely gorgeous day.

They could never understand how much they fill my heart.
Mum showed me pictures of you I had never seen. I read through your baby book. Aside from holding back tears, my heart sank for your parents and all they must have to endure to lose a son like you. I grieve for a future I will never get. They have to grieve a past and an entire life of love for their child they watched grow from a precious baby. I can only imagine.

I love their stories, especially about you. The kids enjoyed going through all the pictures of you, I loved that they loved it. I still can't get over how much Caleb looks like you as a kid - it's uncanny. I wonder if it will be difficult to watch him grow to look like you the way I remember you, the way you will forever be frozen in my memory. I hope, instead, it will bring me peace and joy.

Baby, please hold my heart tonight, let me feel your presence. I miss you so.
I love you with all that I am.

1 comment:

Desi said...

Oh yay I'm so glad you have a special closeness with his family and that they you all can help each other heal in a way. Love that photo :)


Related Posts with Thumbnails